You TWO Were My Favorite Part

If you’re here because you miss me, I wish I could reach through this screen and pull you both close.

I’d let you stay there as long as you needed. And then I’d probably say something ridiculous, because making you laugh was always one of my favorite things about being alive.

I started making these videos because you were growing up, and I couldn’t figure out how to slow any of it down. So, I saved what I could. Your voices. Your laughter. The way you looked at the world before you knew how complicated it could be.

I thought I was making something for you to watch someday. Along the way, you gave me a life I wanted to keep watching, too.

Being your dad changed what mattered to me. So much of what I once chased became small beside a ride home with you, a night in the pool, or the sound of you laughing in the next room. You helped me learn how to be present for my own life. I will always be grateful I got to spend so much of it beside you.

There are things I hope I told you enough.

You never had to earn my love. You never had to be perfect to keep it. There is no mistake, hard season, or version of yourselves you could become that would make me wish you belonged to anyone but me.

I loved being your dad. On the beautiful days. On the difficult days. On the ordinary days we didn’t know we would someday wish we could have back.

If I’m no longer here, you don’t have to be strong every minute. You can cry. You can be angry. You can miss me in ways you don’t know how to explain. Let people love you through it.

And when happiness finds you again, let it in.

You will never betray me by loving your life. Laughing doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten. Moving forward doesn’t mean leaving me behind. I want you to have a life so full that you sometimes forget to miss me—and feel no guilt when you remember.

Hold on to each other. Keep talking to God, even when all you have are questions. Choose people who are gentle with your hearts. And please don’t spend your years trying to become someone worthy of love. You already are.

These videos hold a little of our life together. Come back whenever you want to hear my voice, remember our laughter, or spend a few minutes with us as we were.

Then go make more memories of your own.

Two little girls. One very blessed dad.

Thank you for letting that be my life.

All my love,

Dad

TOES

There will always be somebody with an opinion about who you should be. You don’t have to hand them the pen. Walk to your own beat. Better yet, skip. Dance in the kitchen. Laugh when it isn’t particularly graceful. Grow into your responsibilities without growing out of everything that makes you feel alive.

Let trust grow through what people consistently do. Keep your boundaries and your sense of humor.

And keep ’em on their toes. Although, knowing you two, I probably should have spent a little more time encouraging everybody to sit down.

DON’T WE

Life keeps changing, even when we would give anything for it to stand still.

I spent too much time believing that providing a good life meant always chasing more. Providing mattered. But so did being there to enjoy the life we already had. The things worth doing will sometimes be difficult. Don’t let difficulty make every dream look impossible. Take the next step. Let small efforts become something beautiful over time. And pay attention to the ordinary days. The little jokes, familiar routines, and five more minutes together add up to the life you’ll miss.

Time flies when your busy living. Don’t we?

FAST CAR

A ticket to anywhere can take you a long way without bringing you any closer to what matters. Chase your dreams, girls. See the world. Just don’t become so busy looking for a better life that you overlook the love already sitting beside you. You have nothing to prove to an audience that doesn’t know your heart.

Some of my happiest moments happened with you in my truck—windows down, music blaring, nowhere extraordinary to be. I hope you remember how that felt. Before you decide happiness must be somewhere far away, remember how much of it fit inside that truck.

ABOVE

Every moment we live becomes a memory, often before we realize how much it means. Choose people who can both give love and receive it. People who let you care for them and show up when you need care, too. There is something beautiful about a life in which love gets to move freely. When I watch us together, I see three lives growing, reaching, and helping one another rise.

Someday, look up at the stars and remember how much life we shared beneath them. Of all the time and space in this world, I got to be here with you.

SHINE

There will be days when finding your way feels hard. Let people help you. You don’t have to produce all your own light. Sometimes love is someone sitting beside you until you can see a little farther. And when you’re able, notice who needs that same kindness from you. Even the people who make everyone laugh need someone to ask how they’re doing.

Your story will have many chapters. Give yourselves permission to live the one you’re in. You can learn from yesterday and make plans for tomorrow without missing the people sitting beside you today.

That’s where your life is happening. Be there for it.

SMALL HOURS

Your dad’s less polished advice: fucks are finite. Spend them wisely.

Give your time and energy to what deserves them. Care deeply about people. Care about your word. Care about the kind of person you become. Let a few minor inconveniences remain minor inconveniences. Life changes. Plans fall apart. Sometimes something wonderful arrives wearing absolutely none of the clothes you expected. Leave room for that.

Our life together was made in small moments I couldn’t have planned into being. You two little wonders taught me to notice them. I was supposed to be teaching you about life, and so often you were the ones showing me how to live it.

AROUND YOU

I believe the love we share reaches beyond the years we’re given together. My faith tells me that God holds what I cannot. He is with you in the places I can’t follow, in the questions I can’t answer, and in every tomorrow I don’t get to see.

When you miss me, I hope you feel close to me in something familiar—a song, a story, a laugh that sounds a little like mine. You don’t have to search for signs or feel something extraordinary. Nothing you feel, or don’t feel, changes how deeply you were loved.

God is within you, all around you, and above you. And I trust Him to hold us close, even when we cannot hold each other.

EYES OPEN

There will be memories you wish you could change. I wish I could have spared you every one of them. You don’t have to pretend they didn’t hurt. You don’t have to erase them to build a beautiful life beyond them. Ask for help when you need it, and give healing the time it takes.

There is still so much you haven’t seen. People you haven’t met. Places where you’ll feel at peace. Happiness you couldn’t possibly predict from where you’re standing now. Be brave enough to take a chance. Wise enough to pay attention. Open enough to let love reach you.

Keep your eyes open, girls. There is more life ahead.

NIGHTS

You probably thought we were just swimming. Shopping. Watching TV. Staying up a little too late. Laughing about something that wouldn’t have been nearly as funny to anybody else. I hope you didn’t have to think much beyond that. I hope you got to simply be children who knew their dad wanted them around. Those nights meant everything to me.

One day, you may understand more fully what it feels like to love someone so much that their happiness becomes part of your own. That was how I loved you. Your joy reached places in me nothing else ever could. When you remember our nights together, remember what we did and the ridiculous things I said. But also remember how it felt to be loved without having to perform for it. You deserve that kind of love throughout your lives.

Some nights never really leave us. I hope ours find you years from now—in a song, a splash of water, a sudden laugh—and bring you a little happiness when you need it. And if you want to honor me, you don’t have to do anything grand. Have a beautiful night with people you love. Put the phone down for a while. Stay a little longer. Make them laugh. And when you think of me, I hope you smile. I was so happy to be there with you.

HOME

Home is the love we carry long after we’ve left the places where we first felt it. It’s a familiar laugh, a voice we can still hear, the feeling of being welcomed exactly as we are.

You were home to me.

Wherever life takes you, I hope the love we shared gives you somewhere inside yourselves to rest. An address can change. A house can belong to someone else. But you will always have a home in the love I have for you.